Welcome Friends.
Friendship is a wonderful thing.
Especially when your a kid.
It's so easy to make a friend and easy to keep them. There's not the pressure of having to measure up - at least not the same as when we are tweens, teens, and adults.
Kids jump on a swing and start swinging, they see a kid beside them and say "Do you want to be my friend?" Then Boom! They are off and playing all over the playground, parents and caregivers are exchanging numbers and countless playdates follow.
Then they enter those awkward years...
The years when they really become self conscious. These are the years that make them really grow. The excitement of a new school (middle school) spending time with their old friends making new ones. Then Boom. Someone doesn't like something about them. It's the end of the world. Old friends either become closer or find new friends. It becomes all about fitting in. That's when they find their true friends that will be with them. There are up's and downs. Pain and tears, Exhilaration and excitement. The memories in these years stick with them. Saying "Hi, Want to be my friend?" Becomes difficult.
Then they choose their path...
High School brings them to their next stage of friendships. The ones that follow their successes and build their confidence. Their friends become more. Confidants. Keepers of their secrets. Friends begin to know more than their parents and caregivers. Some will follow them through college and others will find other paths. Making friends is still easy but they are more discriminatory. Not everyone fits the bill.
Then Off To College
This stage is like grade school to an extent. An opportunity to meet new friends. Friends that sometimes become spouses. These friends are people who mature with them. They meet in class, at a bar, at the library/ computer lab. There's less sigma in some ways and more in others depending on the major and college. There's plenty of opportunity to ask for friends if they are interested. There's a more mature aspect to choosing and keeping friends. Some friends are let go for new ones and others stay lifers.
Adulting isn't easy.
As adults we find it hard to just say hi to someone. We use our kids and their friendships as open doors to try and create friendships. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.
We get judged by how we parent, how we look, our age etc. Saying hi to someone and having a conversation is easy enough but taking that jump to ask about getting together at a parent event or meet at the library with the kids, maybe the park, sometimes gets awkward.
Kids do watch us - as we all know. We should take a page from the kid's book. Just ask. No isn't the end of the world. It's bound to happen. But there's a chance they will say Yes too. Just jump. Then Boom! You may have a new friend too. It's something we should do for ourselves, and our kids will benefit too.
Our world will open a bit and we will grow, and so will there's.
That's what friends are for.
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Stay safe, Stay healthy, Live, Love and Be Fierce,
Melissa Shrader
Editor and Publisher Fort Collins Macaroni KID
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